What to say, what to say…

Wow!  It seems like there are days when a specific topic pops into my mind while I’m teaching a class or on the way to/from work.  Then there are days like today when there are SO many subjects whirl-pooling and flooding the brain, it’s hard to pick just one from the rapid current!

We’ll go with a moment when I was surprised by my mother two days ago.

The first part of the surprise was to find a big pink envelope in the mailbox from my sweet Okaa-san (mom).  It amazes me how letters from her seem to arrive on the day of the holiday or a b-day or some other special occasion.  It’s as if she sprinkles magic time dust on the letter and *poof* it gets here on the day!  Okay… surprise part 1.

Surprise Part 2… it was addressed to me (of course), but she had written my first name, middle initial and maiden name.

Yes, I used to be married.  Seems like it was a lifetime ago… the divorce happened just over 10 years ago.  (Guess that would be a lifetime in the opinion of a 10-year-old, right?)  And blogs about the marriage, divorce and everything in between will come in the future, I’m sure… but not today.

So, even after the divorce was finalized, my mother wrote my married name on packages and letters.  It made sense… I mean, the American consulate told me that they couldn’t do anything about name changes and that I’d have to do so in the States.  (The consulate handles marriages but not divorces… a real pain.)  And since I never spend that much time in one city while in the U.S., my name is still as it was when I was married.  And as mentioned above, that’s name my mom wrote.

Until two days ago, that is.

Not sure if it was a fluke or if she did that on purpose, but as soon as I saw what was written, I smiled.  It was like I was being told, “THIS is who you are!”  Isn’t that strange?

I wonder if there are other people out there who’ve felt the same way…


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. keith
    Feb 17, 2012 @ 03:09:13

    I can’t say that I’ve ever felt that way about a name. I can tell you that for a while I took my eyebrow ring out and let it grow back. I did it for a show I was in and just never bothered to get a spacer or a temporary ring that I could take out while performing, but still have in. I decided I wanted it re-pierced. When i got it done, the barbell was in, I looked in the mirror and said “yep, This is who I am. I’m finally back to being me.” I never thought I had that much attachment to it, but it is totally part of who I am.


    • Birdie
      Feb 17, 2012 @ 20:20:24

      I didn’t realize I was that attached to my name either. (Maybe it has something to do with the fact that my maiden name is rather unusual…?) Interesting about your barbell… I wonder if you’d feel the same way if you had to take out your other piercings, ne?


  2. keith
    Feb 22, 2012 @ 14:18:58

    I know that I would feel that way about my other piercings. When I do shows, I have to take my earrings out, my nose ring, and I have a plastic spacer for my eyebrow so I can take it out but still keep the hole open. It is a ritual taking them out before putting on makeup, and very much a part of taking off the makeup and getting out of character.


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